From jaw@ic.net Mon Jun  8 09:17:07 EDT 1998
Article: 120649 of rec.running
From: jaw@ic.net (Jeff Waugh)
Subject: Overwhelmed while running ( kinda long )
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Date: 8 Jun 98 02:17:26 GMT
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I have been lurking here for many months, drawing knowledge and inspiration 
>from  the regular contributors, and today, feel that I have something to 
share with the group.

I am a 44 yr old man, who, until a couple of years ago, was following the
path of least resistance. Working the day job, coming home to steaks and
burgers, plopping down in front of the TV with a pint of ice cream, and
basically 'fattening' myself up for the eventual bypass surgery. 

I spent a couple of years after my divorce feeling pretty much used up, and
willing to continue to slide into death. My attitude had turned into
"What's the point?" about pretty much everything. I wasn't suicidal or
anything, but often thought that if I got creamed by one of the semi's or
SUV's on the highway, not much would be lost.

There's not any major event that happened to change my view of the world
( though, I did notice that the women I was looking at were a bit heavier
than those who used to attract my attention ). 

Anyway, one day I looked in the mirror and thought "Man, I'm getting fat.
I need to do something about this." So, I bought a bike. I rode religiously
for almost 3 weeks, but it was just so much easier to plop down in front
of the TV. Hmmm, THAT hadn't worked. So, I guess I got really lucky and
bought some rollerblades. First time out I needed to rest every few
hundred yards. But it was fun and I kept at it. All I could think about
the last half of the work day was getting out to the park and skating. And
it worked. I skated every day. I was up to about 100 miles a week, and
was starting to lose weight. I mean, there were actually muscles under all
that soft stuff. One Saturday last September, it started to rain after I
had skated only a couple of miles. I was so bummed. The weekends were the 
times that I could go for hours, and here it was raining. I noticed that
the runners didn't appear to be affected. ( I had noticed the runners before,
they were always getting in my way ) So, I decided to give it a try. "I'm
in pretty good shape. I can do that." 

Wow. I huffed and puffed almost a mile ( with many walking breaks ). But it
felt pretty good, so I made running a part of my exercise ( when it was 
wet anyway. It was great to have something to do when I couldn't skate. ).
And, winter was fast approaching, so this would be something that I could
do even in the snow. 

Well, in no time I was up to 3 miles, and kept pushing myself further and 
faster and then injury. I don't know what it was, but my butt, right at the
hip joint, was so sore I could hardly walk. But, I was not to be deterred.
I ran through the pain, until I could not run at all. That's about the time
I remembered seeing some running group on usenet. So I read. And discovered
that I had violated one of the cardinal rules of running ( the 10% rule ), and
I read some more, and discovered that I had also violated the rule about
NOT running while injured. So I took the sage advice of the group, and rested
until I felt no more pain. And when I started again, I started slowly, and
increased even more slowly. And it worked. I have been running pain free for
about 4 months. Thanks to all, for repeating what should be common sense,
over and over again.

So, on to the point. Today, I had the most incredible experience. I had taken
the kids to their mother's for the day, the laundry was finished, it was a
beautiful day, so I decided to go for a run. After starting out, I almost
turned back and went home. My legs felt really heavy, and my breathing was
much more labored that it should have been. But instead, I started to 
think about form. Raise those knees just a little higher. Stand up straight.
Relax the shoulders. Steady breathing. When I reached the first stoplight
I checked my watch, and had beaten my usual time by 45 seconds. "Wow! This is
great!". After that, running seemed effortless. I felt like I was floating.
Each checkpoint was at a better time than I had ever achieved. I'm glad I
continued. About halfway through, I was in a park, running alongside a river,
and suddenly was overwhelmed by emotion. This was serious. I was choked up.
Tears were streaming down my face. I was washed with a feeling of complete
Joy. I felt complete, fulfilled, in tune. The sounds of the birds and the 
river were so clear. The blueness of the sky, the beauty of the clouds. 
Everything was so amplified. Even the people ( who are often 'in the way'
were such a delight ( I just kept thinking 'empty boat' ( thanks Ozzie ))
"Man, THIS is being alive!"

Today, I became a runner. I know that this is something that I will do for
the rest of my life, if for no other reason than to re-capture that feeling.
I had enjoyed running, but now I can honestly say "I *LOVE* running".

Well, that's all I wanted to say. Thanks to all of you who repeat yourselves
so often, with no attitude, and no 'Read the FAQ, stupid', and share your
knowledge and experiences so freely. I don't know if I could have kept with
it without this group.

( Oh yeah, the high point of my run was that I got my first 'Woo Hoo' from 
some young girls driving by in their car, admiring my *fine* legs. )

-Jeff "a runner is born every day" Waugh